Tom Cruise Is So Fired

Tom Cruise is no longer working with Paramount Pictures. Cruise's crazy behavior has become too much for the studio, and they need to end their relationship.

Viacom Chariman Sumner Redstone, had this to say:"As much as we like him personally, we thought it was wrong to renew his deal. His recent conduct has not been acceptable to Paramount."

I haven't had as many real jobs as some people may think, but I got fired from all of them, so I don't judge Tom for it. My last job consisted of me jerking off at the local sperm bank. Based on my new Babysitter's Club book I'm reading, I'm pretty confident that I'll have a genius daughter who solves local crimes, and teaches people a lesson.

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