Tyra Banks is too famous to pay

Self-centered bitch Tyra Banks decided to screw over the working man last Saturday. According to a witness, Russell Simmons and Tyra Banks "dined and dashed" on their bill at the W. 57th St. Brooklyn Diner. They had no problem ordering over $100 worth of food, but they obviously felt they were too important to pay for it.

The diner's general manager confirmed the oversight. "I'm sure it was an honest mistake."

Honest mistake my ass. Tyra making an honest mistake is like a mountain lion accidentally eating a puppy. The world would be a much safer place if Tyra was thrown in a pit with 10 hungry mountain lions. Why 10 you ask? Because 10 is scarier than one. And I'm sure a demon bitch like Tyra can shoot lasers out of her eyes.

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